Jesus wept.

Good morning friends! I hope this post finds you smiling and enjoying your morning, whatever that may look like.

I am still reading through John, as I have a few times in my life, and discovering new messages and characteristics of Jesus along the way. God’s word is fascinating like that. It is so packed with wisdom; I can learn multiple things from a single verse or phrase.

Today, I read through chapter 11. This chapter covers the death of Lazarus and his resurrection through Jesus. It is some pretty incredible stuff, packed with emotion, imagery, and a full-on miracle. There was one chunk of verses though that stopped me right in the middle of reading and acted as my own little “I love you” from Jesus.

When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied. Jesus wept. John 33-35

To set the stage, Jesus was friends with the sibling group Lazarus, Mary, and Martha. Lazarus was sick and had died while Jesus was only a short distance away. Mary and Martha had sent word to Jesus that Lazarus was sick in plenty of time for Jesus to come immediately and save him from death by physical healing. However, Jesus stayed where he was for two more days. Once Jesus started on his way, he knew Lazarus was dead. Today, we know that his waiting was purposeful. But take a moment to empathize with Mary and Martha in that moment.

What were they feeling?

Well, if it were me, I would be absolutely irate; admittedly just as I have felt toward God when he did not respond in the way I believed appropriate. I do not say this lightly. I have experienced things in this life that left me feeling angry at God for not showing up how I wanted him to in moments of need. I imagine you have as well, my friends.

When Jesus arrived in town, Martha ran out to greet him. Mary did not. Now, when Martha approached him, she quickly informed him that he could have stopped this tragedy from happening. They discussed who Jesus is and, in this dialogue, it is evident her faith in him was intact. She was heartbroken and could have been angry (I do not know from scripture), but she sought him out and remained faithful. Then, she went to get Mary to bring her to Jesus.

Mary took some coaxing; she did not immediately greet Jesus. It made me wonder what her thoughts were; if she avoided him out of anger, maybe confusion, or even because she doubted him. We don’t know, we can only speculate. If it were me, I think I would have felt a bit of all three. There have been times in life that I was broken and instead of running to Jesus baring my wound and eager to engage with him, I avoided him.

Thank you, God for the Marthas in my life that pulled me to him in those times.

When Mary got to Jesus, she fell at his feet and cried. The scripture depicts that all she said was, “Lord if you had been here my brother would not have died.” It’s Jesus’ reaction in the next few verses that grabbed ahold of my heart.

He saw Mary weep, broken, and was deeply moved and troubled. In response, he wept. Jesus wept…with Mary. The onlookers at the time noted his emotional response and attributed it to how he felt about Lazarus. I imagine that attributed greatly to his reaction as well. But when I read this today, I felt the Lord say, “I hurt with you when you hurt.” Not audibly, but this notion just settled over me in that very moment.

Jesus knew exactly what the next few moments following this would hold. He knew Lazarus would live again. He even alluded to it in John 11:14. But, he was moved and troubled in his spirit. I believe he loved Mary so much that he was feeling that pain with her. She was broken, and he felt her brokenness deeply.

Isaiah 55:8 & 9 remind us that God sees what we do not. He anticipates and builds in moments we feel he has forgotten us. Romans 8 reminds us that he works all things for our good. I know these truths by heart, and at the same time have to relearn them over and over. That is the human part of me, I guess.

When I think back on some of those moments of heartache I referenced earlier, I feel so thankful that God responded as he did instead of as I believed he should. God has given me blessings that I could not have imagined at times in my life. Even my most ideal visions for myself would have short-changed me from what God has worked into place. I am so thankful for that. There are some things, though, that I do not understand and have just had to accept that I may never until I meet Jesus in Heaven. I just don’t get now why the pain and loss was necessary.

I am also thankful, though, that Jesus sat with me in that pain. Though he knows better days are ahead, he loves us so much, that he meets us where we are. Even in the ugly. He breaks for us, with us.

I hope this message encourages you, wherever you are today. I hope if it is in one of those excruciating moments that you feel held and known by Jesus, though you do not understand why he is not responding like you believe he should. Know he’s right there in the raw, he is weeping with you, and he has a plan in place to bring goodness to your life. Know he loves you, friends.