Welcome Back

I have been reading a few Psalms this morning. Specifically Psalms 13 through 18. I love how David talks with God. Sometimes he sounds like he is talking with a friend while others he has a reverence in his speech like he is talking to a father or a close leader. Sometimes he is giving thanks to God for his goodness and protection while other times he shares his frustration with feeling distant from Him. He sings praise to God in some prayers and he advocates for himself in others.

The overall theme I am seeing in these verses is reliance. David really relied on God; for comfort, for protection, for vindication, for companionship, for validation, for counsel.

Here are a few verses from these six chapters that highlight his reliance. If you are running short on time this morning – as most of us probably are since it is Friday- read through these verses. I encourage you to take some time later to read through the full chapters, at least a couple so you can see the different ways he talks with and approaches God.

Psalm 13:5-6 “But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing the Lord’s praise, for he has been good to me.”

Psalm 16:1″Keep me safe, my God, for in you I take refuge.”

Psalm 17:2 “Let my vindication come from you; may your eyes see what is right.”

Psalm 18: 1-3 “I love you, Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I called to the Lord, who is worthy of praise,
and I have been saved from my enemies.”

God is so good. His love does not cease, even when our communication or desire for His companionship does. Since my last post, I have moved to another city (three actually), had a son, worked in child safety (that is its own beast), stopped working completely to stay home with my child, started school and got engaged to marry my best friend (who partnered with me through all of this). I will most likely draw on the last two years in future posts, which will call for me to elaborate on each life change. To summarize today, this has been the most difficult and most wonderful growth stretch of my life. My communication with God and my own perception of reliance on Him has bobbed and weaved along the way. I say my own perception because realistically, I rely on Him to get up every morning because He brings life, but sometimes my perception is that I am self-reliant or reliant on other people.

Since 2019 kicked off, I have been refocusing on communicating more with my Heavenly Father. It is hard. I don’t know why, but it is. I think I carry a few burdens with me that I am trying to lay down. I also think I can just be lazy. But I want to testify that God is meeting me where I am. He is being faithful to me, and reminding me of His love and existence. I still feel distant, but the familiarity is there. So, I am going to keep working. I think I am going to camp out in Psalms for a while and let David teach me a few things about relying on God.

Welcome back, friends. It has been so long, posting this entry today feels really awkward. It is also good for my soul. Thank you for reading.